Just a quick blog:

I have been thinking about this quote a lot lately. It means a lot to me and I try and read it often. I need to memorize it and personalize it (as shown at the end of this blog). It's a quote by Marianne Williamson. The first time I heard it was when I watched the movie "Akeelah and the Bee" (If you haven't seen it, you need to!):

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."

This is how we need to say it to ourself:

"My deepest fear is not that I am inadequate. My deepest fear is that I am powerful beyond measure. It is my light, not my darkness that most frightens me. I ask myself, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who am I not to be? I am a child of God. My playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around me. I am meant to shine, as children do. I was born to make manifest the glory of God that is within me. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as I let my own light shine, I unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As I am liberated from my own fear, my presence automatically liberates others."

Read it; breathe it; LIVE IT!! Don't be afraid of the greatness of God that is within you! Embrace Him, and the gifts He has given you, so that you may shine for Him and give Him the glory!! GOD BLESS ALL WHO READ THIS!

Well, it has happened. It is 6:41 a.m. as I am typing this. Yep, you heard me right!! It's early morning and I am up! It wasn't easy, and I didn't want to get up, but I did. I didn't even get a full eight hours and I slept rotten, which would be a perfect excuse not to get up yet, but I did anyways. My husband woke me up before he left for work, and God helped me get me out of bed.

I opened my eyes as I laid there. I thought and pondered about getting up and not eating the bread of idleness, and being like the Proverbs 31 woman who gets up early in the morning to get things done. That's who I want to be, and who I am going to be.

So, I am going to spend time with God first thing, and share with you this next day of the 40 days of prayer, which explores betrothal. Here is what Kim wrote for this journal entry:

"We need to understand and experience our Bride relationship with Jesus to be drawn into deeper intimacy with Him.In order to understand this relationship better we will look at it in the context of Jewish betrothal. Betrothal in Jesus' day was a legally binding commitment that you were married to someone even before the marriage was consummated physically. We will spedn the next few days looking at the parts of betrothal. I pray through this you are drawn into a deeper adoration of Jesus."

Often times, the Jewish father would pick the bride for his son and arrange the marriage. Although, there were times when the son would pick the bride. In our case, God chose US (the church) to be his bride. We are betrothed to Him, and married to Christ. And, of course, marriage is a commitment that isn't to be taken lightly.

So, thinking about that, I got to think about what being married to Christ means. Just like being married to my earthly husband, I need to strive to honor and submit to Christ.

Today's verses clearly illustrate that we should be thankful and rejoice in the blessing of being made and chosen by God. 2 Thessalonians 2:13 says: But we are bound to give thanks alway to God for you, brethren beloved of the Lord, because God hath from the beginning chosen you to salvation through sanctification of the Spirit and belief of the truth:

Ephesians 2:10 says: For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus unto good works, which God hath before ordained that we should walk in them.

Ezekiel 16:4-8 says: 4And as for thy nativity, in the day thou wast born thy navel was not cut, neither wast thou washed in water to supple thee; thou wast not salted at all, nor swaddled at all.

 5None eye pitied thee, to do any of these unto thee, to have compassion upon thee; but thou wast cast out in the open field, to the lothing of thy person, in the day that thou wast born.

 6And when I passed by thee, and saw thee polluted in thine own blood, I said unto thee when thou wast in thy blood, Live; yea, I said unto thee when thou wast in thy blood, Live.

 7I have caused thee to multiply as the bud of the field, and thou hast increased and waxen great, and thou art come to excellent ornaments: thy breasts are fashioned, and thine hair is grown, whereas thou wast naked and bare.

Praise God for His salvation! Praise God that He loves us SO MUCH and has chosen us! He saved us from death and sin. He didn't pass us by, but redeemed us and rescued us. I am so thankful that I get to have a relationship with God through Jesus Christ!! I'm a detestable and unworthy sinner, but He loves me. Just like the new Toby Mac song, "Made to Love" states: 

I was made to love You
I was made to find You
I was made just for You
Made to adore You
I was made to love and be loved by You
You were here before me
You were waiting on me
And you said You'd keep me never would You leave me
I was made to love
And be loved by You

I am blessed by this song every time I hear it. You can find this song on his page on www.myspace.com/tobymac How true it is isn't it? We are all created to love and be loved. We all have that desire. And, even if we don't realize it, we are all searching for that true love. Sometimes, it is even misplaced and we seek it in other people or things. But love, REAL love stems from God because GOD IS LOVE. He is the very essence of love. He is the MODEL of love. He is there for us; always has been and always will be. He is the beginning and the end and knew our name before we even came into being.

Just speaking of the might and love of God just gives me peace and leaves me in a state of awe. How wonderful it is to be loved by God and to know that salvation is ours and freely given. In Him, we have new life, and life forever with Him. How great it will be to see the Savior face to face in heaven and spend eternity with the one who has always loved me. When I think of His true love, I really do feel the marriage bond between me and Christ. He is commited to loving me and I am commited to Him also. I will seek and pursue Him, just as He did me and died for me so that I would have the opportunity to be with Him forever. He loved me like crazy and doesn't want to do without me. He wants us never to be separated; but to be together forever. So, the way was paved by His death on the cross; that we might all be with Christ forever and ever and not suffer eternal separation from Him in Hell.

Ezekiel 16:8-34, and 60-63:

8Now when I passed by thee, and looked upon thee, behold, thy time was the time of love; and I spread my skirt over thee, and covered thy nakedness: yea, I sware unto thee, and entered into a covenant with thee, saith the Lord GOD, and thou becamest mine.

 9Then washed I thee with water; yea, I throughly washed away thy blood from thee, and I anointed thee with oil.

 10I clothed thee also with broidered work, and shod thee with badgers' skin, and I girded thee about with fine linen, and I covered thee with silk.

 11I decked thee also with ornaments, and I put bracelets upon thy hands, and a chain on thy neck.

 12And I put a jewel on thy forehead, and earrings in thine ears, and a beautiful crown upon thine head.

 13Thus wast thou decked with gold and silver; and thy raiment was of fine linen, and silk, and broidered work; thou didst eat fine flour, and honey, and oil: and thou wast exceeding beautiful, and thou didst prosper into a kingdom.

 14And thy renown went forth among the heathen for thy beauty: for it was perfect through my comeliness, which I had put upon thee, saith the Lord GOD.

 15But thou didst trust in thine own beauty, and playedst the harlot because of thy renown, and pouredst out thy fornications on every one that passed by; his it was.

 16And of thy garments thou didst take, and deckedst thy high places with divers colours, and playedst the harlot thereupon: the like things shall not come, neither shall it be so.

 17Thou hast also taken thy fair jewels of my gold and of my silver, which I had given thee, and madest to thyself images of men, and didst commit whoredom with them,

 18And tookest thy broidered garments, and coveredst them: and thou hast set mine oil and mine incense before them.

 19My meat also which I gave thee, fine flour, and oil, and honey, wherewith I fed thee, thou hast even set it before them for a sweet savour: and thus it was, saith the Lord GOD.

 20Moreover thou hast taken thy sons and thy daughters, whom thou hast borne unto me, and these hast thou sacrificed unto them to be devoured. Is this of thy whoredoms a small matter,

 21That thou hast slain my children, and delivered them to cause them to pass through the fire for them?

 22And in all thine abominations and thy whoredoms thou hast not remembered the days of thy youth, when thou wast naked and bare, and wast polluted in thy blood.

 23And it came to pass after all thy wickedness, (woe, woe unto thee! saith the LORD GOD;)

 24That thou hast also built unto thee an eminent place, and hast made thee an high place in every street.

 25Thou hast built thy high place at every head of the way, and hast made thy beauty to be abhorred, and hast opened thy feet to every one that passed by, and multiplied thy whoredoms.

 26Thou hast also committed fornication with the Egyptians thy neighbours, great of flesh; and hast increased thy whoredoms, to provoke me to anger.

 27Behold, therefore I have stretched out my hand over thee, and have diminished thine ordinary food, and delivered thee unto the will of them that hate thee, the daughters of the Philistines, which are ashamed of thy lewd way.

 28Thou hast played the whore also with the Assyrians, because thou wast unsatiable; yea, thou hast played the harlot with them, and yet couldest not be satisfied.

 29Thou hast moreover multiplied thy fornication in the land of Canaan unto Chaldea; and yet thou wast not satisfied therewith.

 30How weak is thine heart, saith the LORD GOD, seeing thou doest all these things, the work of an imperious whorish woman;

 31In that thou buildest thine eminent place in the head of every way, and makest thine high place in every street; and hast not been as an harlot, in that thou scornest hire;

 32But as a wife that committeth adultery, which taketh strangers instead of her husband!

 33They give gifts to all whores: but thou givest thy gifts to all thy lovers, and hirest them, that they may come unto thee on every side for thy whoredom.

 34And the contrary is in thee from other women in thy whoredoms, whereas none followeth thee to commit whoredoms: and in that thou givest a reward, and no reward is given unto thee, therefore thou art contrary.

60Nevertheless I will remember my covenant with thee in the days of thy youth, and I will establish unto thee an everlasting covenant.

 61Then thou shalt remember thy ways, and be ashamed, when thou shalt receive thy sisters, thine elder and thy younger: and I will give them unto thee for daughters, but not by thy covenant.

 62And I will establish my covenant with thee; and thou shalt know that I am the LORD:

 63That thou mayest remember, and be confounded, and never open thy mouth any more because of thy shame, when I am pacified toward thee for all that thou hast done, saith the Lord GOD.

A time of love where he covers us and makes a covenant (promise) to us: the gift of salavation. His blood covers us and reconciles us. He cleanses and forgives our sins. He washes away our sin and disgrace. We belong to Him, and he annoints us and comissions us to do His will and to bring others back to Him. We must NOT take the ornamentation of our gifts and spit in the face of God by squandering them on worldy things. We must not use or gifts for our own glory, or become vain and corrupted in our hearts. We must not lead people astray by acts such as this; or sacrifice our children (whether literally or spiritually). Life is valuable and cherished and we are special to God; each and every one of us. He does not desire any of us to be lost to Hell and damnation. We must remember that he rescued us and delivered us. He chose us and blessed us, and we must not trample His gifts to us underfoot.

Yet, even when we commit such dastardly deeds, he remembers his commitment to us; even when we are commited wholeheartedly to Him. He loves us THAT much. He forgives us and washes us clean again; just as any father who picks up his bruised and broken child to mend their wounds and make them new again.

Lord, I know that I am a sinner. I have done evil and wicked things. I plead for your fogiveness. I am grieved over the shame of the things I have done. Thank you for forgiving me of my sins. Lord, I am so sorry for not being the servant, wife, and mother I need to be. I am sorry for the bad attitude I have sometimes. I am sorry for getting angry at little things and losing my temper. I am sorry for being idle, lazy, and a lover of sleep. Thank you for awakening me today, and may I rise early to fellowship and praise you every morning.

Thank you for your promises Lord. I pray you give us all a newfound strength, and that we don't rely on our own; which fails us. Renew us. Refresh us. Redeem us. Put a fresh fire and desire in our hearts. Break us and mold us. Prepare the way for growth. Transform the world around us and let us be lights that shine for you. Amen.

Today's entry for the prayer warriors begins in Isaiah 62:

1For Zion's sake will I not hold my peace, and for Jerusalem's sake I will not rest, until the righteousness thereof go forth as brightness, and the salvation thereof as a lamp that burneth.

2And the Gentiles shall see thy righteousness, and all kings thy glory: and thou shalt be called by a new name, which the mouth of the LORD shall name.

3Thou shalt also be a crown of glory in the hand of the LORD, and a royal diadem in the hand of thy God.

4Thou shalt no more be termed Forsaken; neither shall thy land any more be termed Desolate: but thou shalt be called Hephzibah, and thy land Beulah: for the LORD delighteth in thee, and thy land shall be married.

5For as a young man marrieth a virgin, so shall thy sons marry thee: and as the bridegroom rejoiceth over the bride, so shall thy God rejoice over thee.

6I have set watchmen upon thy walls, O Jerusalem, which shall never hold their peace day nor night: ye that make mention of the LORD, keep not silence,

7And give him no rest, till he establish, and till he make Jerusalem a praise in the earth.

8The LORD hath sworn by his right hand, and by the arm of his strength, Surely I will no more give thy corn to be meat for thine enemies; and the sons of the stranger shall not drink thy wine, for the which thou hast laboured:

9But they that have gathered it shall eat it, and praise the LORD; and they that have brought it together shall drink it in the courts of my holiness.

10Go through, go through the gates; prepare ye the way of the people; cast up, cast up the highway; gather out the stones; lift up a standard for the people.

11Behold, the LORD hath proclaimed unto the end of the world, Say ye to the daughter of Zion, Behold, thy salvation cometh; behold, his reward is with him, and his work before him.

12And they shall call them, The holy people, The redeemed of the LORD: and thou shalt be called, Sought out, A city not forsaken.

Can you imagine how glorious this world would be if God's people would behave as God's people should? Can you imagine the peace, restoration, and blessings that would flow from the Lord?

What if we start preparing the way for that to happen? What would happen if we humbled ourselves and prayed? What would happen if people confessed and repented of their sins and watched God change them? That would start a revolution, and we would see real change in this nation, and the world!! It doesn't even have to be a group or a church; it starts with us. What starts with one spreads to many. Be a light; be a fire!! The spark that we start will grow and grow as it spreads until we are all just this great big flame!

God is calling us to a higher standard. He wants to renew and restore us. How bad do we want it? Do we want to be the kind of people described? Do we want the Lord to be pleased and delight in us that he gives us that "new name."? Certainly if people truly grab hold of what it means to be a Christian, we will be more than just "evangelicals" or whatever the media likes to call us. What name will we have when we are totally surrendered and sold out for Christ? What would that look like?

I am sure eager to see that happen!! I want to be part of it! I will continually seek the Lord as he clears out my heart and head and prepares me for His will. I got a lot of work to do. In fact, while praying today about what else I need to give up and what things I might be idolizing and not know it, I came up with nothing. That is, until my idol hit me right in the face.

As I was praying, I got a little to comfortable and nodded off. This wasn't the first time this has happened, and the mistake I made both times was remaining asleep. "A little rest won't hurt," right? Everyone needs to rest, right? Sure, we all need to rest, but too much of anything is not good. Just like food, sleep can be abused. We can't totally give up food or sleep, which is what makes it hard to get control over and maintain balance.

Not only that, I have a hard time getting up in the mornings. Oh, I hate mornings! I just can't do it!! I have long prayed that God would help me learn to rise up early in the morning so that I can get things done. However, it has always been hard for me. But, just like today, God showed me how my idleness and desire to sleep can be an idol. When I spend too much time sleeping or doing nothing, I waste time that I could be getting things done; as well as having to rush around and add more stress to my workload when I do get around to doing something. And, I may even waste MORE time by having to deal with the consequences of my time spent sleeping/idling.

That was certainly true today. Yesterday, I managed to put my daughter in her crib to play for a bit while I read the Bible and prayed. My son was in the other room watching a movie. Everything worked out. But, TODAY when I did that same thing, it blew up in my face because I allowed myself to drift off of my prayers and into some "rest." I thought I would just "rest" a few minutes, but it ended up being a little longer than that. So, when I finally woke myself up, I went into the living room. My son was still watching his movie, but he had taken his clothes off; including his poopy diaper. Thank goodness he didn't sit his butt down on the furniture or make a mess with that diaper! He just set the diaper aside, and set himself down on the floor.

So, I had a big mess! I wasted time by buying into the "rest" lie that Satan twists for his own purposes of distraction, and I wasted more time by having to clean up the stains on the floor from my son's mess.

At least it was nothing serious. Still, I learned my lesson. It really "opened my eyes." I feel so embarrassed and ashamed to even talk about this, but I know that confession and repentance is vital, and that helping others who might also have this same deception and idol in their life is worth it.

While it's true that we all need to slow down and take a break to rest, we got to keep it in perspective as well. I have begun setting the timer to let me know when my rest is up, so I don't give myself the "just a few more minutes, I deserve it," excuse.

I am grateful that God exposed this major flaw in myself. It's something that I have been fighting for a long time, but never saw it as an idol until now. Even the Bible says not to love sleep or eat the bread of idleness. I am going to write down verses like these and memorize them so that I can overcome these issues and be a more faithful and productive servant. I want to be like the Proverbs 31 woman!:


Psalm 7:16 The trouble he causes recoils on himself; his violence comes down on his own head.


Proverbs 20:13 Love not sleep, lest thou come to poverty; open thine eyes, and thou shalt be satisfied with bread.

Proverbs 31:27 She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.


I hope this helps someone. I also hope it shows everyone how sinfully human I am. I don't want anyone to ever forget that no matter how many blessings and good things I have from the Lord, I STILL have problems. I am NOT perfect and I DON'T have it all together. Never forget that we are all the same; just sinners in need of the grace and forgiveness of the Lord.

Lord, please forgive me for my idleness and love of sleep. Discipline me into a better woman. Also, give me more patience and gentleness. Indulging in too much sleep or down time has, indeed, brought trouble to my house. I don't get as much done, then I get frustrated, and have a shorter fuse with myself, the kids, everyone. That's not who I want to be, and it's not the me that people deserve to see. Please forgive me, Lord. Please make me better than this! Amen.

On my myspace page, www.myspace.com/missa_loves_the_lord I have "prayer warriors" on my top friends. That is where you will find the journal outline for the 40 days of prayer. If you haven't seen the page, check it out! The link is www.myspace.com/life_churchpw Currently, I am my only friend on there. LOL But hopefully, that will change and we will see many people deciding that they want to pray and be a part of what God is doing! I can't wait to see the comments and hear about how God is changing peoples' lives!

On that happy note, God did wonderful things for me today! There is so much that I can't even begin to describe it all. I prayed that the Lord would give me discernment and discretion. After all, I need not share everything. Sometimes, he wants us to share, and other times, we need to just keep it between us and God. I pray that I can better distinguish those times, because it's so easy for me to go on and on and share every little thing in my head/heart. But, God's timing is perfect and what may make sense to me and hit me just at the right time may not do the same for everyone else. I pray that only what God wants me to share will be made known in this blog. The rest, I will treasure in my heart, and praise God that He has been making some things known to me and working on me so much!

The journal entries for the 40 days of prayer were not conjured up by me, but by another wondeful servant of the Lord! This remarkable lady, Kim, is one of the leaders of the prayer team, and the Lord gave her a great outline! It uses the ACTS format; A- adoration, C- confession, T- thanksgiving, S- supply the needs.

So, day one was about preparing for this journey. Today, we get digging into it! It's about clearing the way for the King. I'm not going to type out every entry on my own blog; just my thoughts on them. So, if you want to know more and join on in, you'll have to check out the prayer warriors page. ;)

Anyways, God spoke to me a lot today. I had a great prayer time with Him. I read in Psalms 24 about how strong and mighty he is and how I should open up my heart to him. Inviting Him in is to be submissive and humble. We WILL encounter the Lord if we truly seek His face. We do that by casting down our idols, confessing, repenting, and allowing Him to purify our hearts. When we put to death the sinful nature, we are open to receiving the Lord's blessings.

I pray that the Lord will continually refresh me. I pray that he will purify my thoughts, words, actions, and heart. Dear Lord, be ever present with me, so that I may hear your voice and make decisions based on what you want. I want to be that kind of generation who seeks you.

When I got to the thanksgiving and needs part of today, I really poured out to God. It's encouraging to me, because I had always struggled so much with prayer. I got too hung up on "what to say" or whatever. Now, I just don't hold back. I just say what is on my heart and talk to the Lord. And, I listen. When/if distractions come, I concentrate on a picture of God's radiance in my mind to keep my focus. Then, the things of this world fade away and I remain concentrated on Him.

The following two paragraphs are what I wrote during my prayer time. Following that is a visual that I had of God vs. Satan:

There is so much praise and thanks to give to the Lord; more than I could ever say or write. Lord, you are worthy of it all. All the praise I have to give wouldn't even equal a fraction of what you're due. Lord, you have blessed me beyond measure. I can't even begin to list them all! Thank you for being who you are. Where would I be if I didn't have you? Who among us can really do without you? What else can fill the longing in our hearts? Nothing. Lord, you are what fills the emptiness when we are down and low. You lift us up and embrace us; your children. Who could ask for a greater Father?

Lord, may every being that has breath sing your praises. May they all fill that desire in their heart with the fullness and completion that comes from you. May we hunger and thirst for you and cast all selfishness and vanity far from us. May we humble ourselves before you and pray. I plead for you to draw near and pour out your presence. May it be unmistakable and undeniable. Let your kingdom reign in our hearts and in our lives. May we see the awesome effects of your glory as we draw close to you.......

There is so much more that transpired beween God and I. Most of it personal stuff about what he wants from me and what I need to do. Then, I also seen this visual, of how great God is. I thought of Him as this giant radiant body of light. Then, near his feet is this tiny little pest of a bug. It was nothing but Satan; tiny, unimportant, and trying to be bigger than he is. I carry this visual in my heart to remind me that GOD IS ALWAYS BIGGER! I won't allow myself to be manipulated by some insignificant "bug" who is trying to spoil God's plans. God is VICTORIOUS and he CRUSHES that pitiful little bug underneath his feet! Therefore, with God on MY SIDE I can do the same thing!! Take that Satan!! Nyah nyah nyah nyah! :P

Being empowered by God gives me the victory! I pray that I will always carry this image within my heart; so that I never forget that God is bigger than any problem, person, thing, or demon.

How easy it is for the Almighty God to CRUSH Satan! With that great power of the Most High God, we too have the power to squash Satan! God is on our side. He will help us defeat the evil one!! AMEN!!! God bless all who read this!

Days 16-21 of 21 days of prayer:

Since I wasn't here to blog all of these days, I will just be brief with these days. After all, we got 40 more days of prayer to look forward to! :) Oh yeah, and in addition to that, I will also post another series on Neil T. Anderson's "The Bondage Breaker." Our small group is going to start reading that, so I will have that and the 40 days of prayer to write about. I know it will be an awesome learning time!

Anyways, here are the scriptures from the last few days:

Day 16: Genesis 18:14

Is any thing too hard for the LORD? At the time appointed I will return unto thee, according to the time of life, and Sarah shall have a son.

NOTHING is too hard for the Lord!! If the Lord wants it done, it will be done. Yeah, that includes myself as well. I know that God is preparing me for who knows what, but He will show me step by step. And, being that God is God, it will get done! I will be obedient and learn to listen and be still so I can hear His voice so I can carry out His will. As evident from my last blog about the prayer group night, God does AWESOME THINGS!! I want to be a part of it, and I will allow God to use me and the gifts He gave me in order to glorify His name and help others find Christ and grow in their faith in Him.

Day 17: Ephesians 6:10-13

Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord, and in the power of his might.

 Put on the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil.

 For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.

Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand.

This is just a firm reminder to ponder about the armor of God and to put it on daily! I have been giving it more and more thought, and making it my prayer that God would help me to "suit up" daily so that I may withstand the attacks of the enemy.

Day 18: Ephesians 6:14-17

Stand therefore, having your loins girt about with truth, and having on the breastplate of righteousness;

And your feet shod with the preparation of the gospel of peace;

Above all, taking the shield of faith, wherewith ye shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked.

 And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God:

We must never forget the vitality of the protection we are to arm ourselves with. Every piece is essential to victory and we need to be prepared! We face battles every day in the middle of the war of good and evil. And, needless to say, good will win out. GOD IS GOOD and He will ALWAYS have the last word!

Day 19: Ephesians 6:18

Praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, and watching thereunto with all perseverance and supplication for all saints;

Praying is becoming more and more habitual and easier. I pray that I will continue to build onto my prayer life more and more and never be without it!! I want to be a prayer warrior!! AMEN!

Day 20: Joshua 6

This is the famous story of the fall of Jericho. It's a story of obedience, trust, and victory. God gave Joshua and his army instructions on how to conquer Jericho, and even though the directions didn't seem "conventional" they obeyed the Lord. And, needless to say, when they did it God's way, they won! That's what I need to remember. If I want victory in my life and for things to happen as they should, I need for my ways to be God's ways and for His ways to be my ways. God's way is perfect; and God's way WORKS!! He's the creator of the universe so, duh, of course He knows what He's talking about!! God knows best!

Day 21: Daniel 12 and Revelation 4

Getting into the prophecy about the anti-christ. The anti-christ will bring peace in the middle-east for a time. Then, the peace will be broken and the "abomination that causes desolation" will come. Religion, other than worshipping the anti-christ, will become forbidden, and they will attempt to destroy God's chosen people.

Regardless of what happens, if we are saved, we have the assurance in knowing that God will come back for us. We know that we have the promise of eternal life in heaven, and no matter what man may do, we will stand in our faith until the end; and receive our reward in heaven. God bless all who read this!

Hey everyone!! Sorry I have been gone so long. It's been no picnic, let me tell you!! But, in order to be more productive, I had to take the computer in to get some more RAM and clear it of spyware. Currently, I am using the pc at my Dad's house, but will be getting my own pc tomorrow. Then, I will be back to my regular correspondence and blogs and such. Plus, I will be working on a myspace page for our church's 40 days of prayer leading up to Palm Sunday.

When our prayer group met on Wednesday, it was just AWESOME!! For one, the Holy Spirit just filled me up, and I prayed in tongues, as well as interpreted. I had always had problems with interpretations, but an old pastor of mine told me I should trust what God puts in my head and speak it out. So, I stepped out in faith, and prayed for everyone in that room that night, and interpreted as well. Only GOD could have done that, though. IT WAS NOT ME!!

When I sat down after praying for everyone, I felt like God was confirming some things to me. He showed me what wonders He could do when I stepped out in faith and trusted Him to do what He wanted to accomplish. I allowed the Holy Spirit to work through me, and didn't hold back. Why would I want to? I shouldn't. It's something that is meant to be shared and something I need to be obedient to do.

It was such an encouragement to hear two testimonies as a result. When I came to one woman, I had prayed and felt a weakness in my knees, and had to kneel. I spoke and said that there was weakness, but He is strong and to stay in His strength. The old song "Jesus Loves Me" came to mind...... the part where it says: "they are weak but He is strong."

So, afterward, that lady said that she had been struggling with standing in her own strength, following a long battle with recovering from surgery. She had been singing "Jesus Loves Me" a lot lately, praying that even though she was weak, He was strong. She said that is something only God knew about, and felt as if God was kneeling with her. Wow, Lord, what a blessing!! I am just in awe of you!

The other testimony was when I cam to another sweet woman and gave the interpretation of "sing." She later said she had been struggling in worship time at church with feeling like maybe people would judge her for really giving her all and singing with all her might. She wanted to worship freely, but was afraid to. Now, I feel she won't hold back anymore. ;) Today at church, I observed her worshipping as she felt led, and I was in such awe of God and of the progress she had made in taking that step of faith.

So, that is what has been going on lately. I have so much more to say, but I know I won't be able to spill my guts about everything. So, I will just briefly say that this 21 days of prayer has been great; which is why we will now do a 40 days of prayer leading up to Palm Sunday. I am excited about what the Lord has done, is doing, and will do. :) I pray that you all will join me on the journey!! It sure has been a great experience and I can't wait to see what the Lord will do next!

Day 15 of 21 days of prayer:

 

Today, the reading was in Ephesians 6:10-18. VERY important and insightful verses. :

 

10Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord, and in the power of his might.

 

 11Put on the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil.

 

 12For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.

 

 13Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand.

 

 14Stand therefore, having your loins girt about with truth, and having on the breastplate of righteousness;

 

 15And your feet shod with the preparation of the gospel of peace;

 

 16Above all, taking the shield of faith, wherewith ye shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked.

 

 17And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God:

 

 18Praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, and watching thereunto with all perseverance and supplication for all saints;

 

The Lord is our strength. We are to stand in that strength, always, and be equipped for every day battle that will come by purring on the armor of God. In verse 11, it says to put on the WHOLE armor of God, not just part of it. Every piece of armor is a necessary part of protection.

 

The battles we fight are not against flesh and blood. We are not at war with ourselves or humanity itself, but with the evil spirits that are around us and in those things. They can be in rulers, world-rulers, authorities and all sorts of people and things. We know that in the Bible, many people are described as having evil spirits and demons in them. Today is no exception. The demons never quit their job. They are still around today, and in so many forms. They have more opportunities than ever to influence people. We see it in magic, sorcery, witchcraft, astrology, and other occultic activities. We also see it in drugs and alcohol, the media, the sex industry, and just about everything that you can think of. We can even find it in food. Yes, FOOD! Anything that becomes an addiction or takes control over us, and masters us, can be an evil spirit.

 

This is not to say that we are just all evil people controlled by demons. That is why we are to put on the armor of God. That's why we are to pray continually to fight off Satan and his cronies. We can also have people pray for us and deliver us from those evil spirits. I have experienced it before. Just like I wrote about yesterday, we sensed in our prayer group that spirit of condemnation. There have been many times where I could sense an evil spirit in someone, something, or even resting on myself. I have prayed for others, myself, and had others pray for me. God is greater than any demon, and he will deliver us from those evil and unclean spirits that try and invade our lives.

 

This is why the armor of God is so essential. It gives us the best protection we have of resisting evil and combating the enemy. The enemy is a ruthless bully who will never cease to torment and accuse us. Therefore, we must always be prepared.

 

We are to wear that belt of truth. The belt is a crucial piece. In fact, my footnotes here say that ancient soldiers wore belts that carried so many of their essential pieces for battle. This is no exception. Our spiritual belt holds everything together. Our knowledge of the truth of God is crucial in fighting the enemy. If we know what truth is, we won't be deceived by lies and fall prey to the enemy.

 

The breastplate of righteousness is protection for our heart and our character. When we hold God's truth in our hearts, and behave in a moral and godly manner, we are upholding our character and safeguarding ourselves from attacks on our morality. Once again, our knowledge of morality comes from God's truth, which we must treasure up in our hearts.

 

Our feet is to have the gospel of peace. We must be ready and willing to "run" to people to share the good news of truth. Our enthusiasm and eagerness to spread the news will have us running to others to share it. How much victory are we going to have over Satan if we just stand still? Next to none, my friends. We got to be mobilized and spread the truth!!

 

That is where the shield of faith comes in. As we advance forward with our eager feet, we will be attacked and shot at. We must use our faith to shield us as we continue to march forward into battle. Our faith must be our shield to help us continue moving forward. If we let our "guard" down, we will begin to lose faith, and those fiery darts will hit us more often and wound us more critically.

 

And, of course, we must never do battle without our helmet of salvation. We need to guard and protect our minds. We must rest in the knowledge of our salvation. We know that we are the children of God, and are saved by His grace. Therefore, when the enemy attacks our mind, we need to rebuke him and remind ourselves that the blood of Jesus covers all sins. We are forgiven and redeemed. Guarding our minds is probably one of the toughest, because thoughts influence us a lot. So, we must work extra hard to protect our minds against attacks of doubt and uncertainty.

 

We must also never forget our greatest defense which is the sword of the Spirit. We have the Word of God and the Holy Spirit as our biggest line of defense. Even when Jesus was tempted by Satan, he fought back using the Word of God. That is why we need to eat up the Word and feast on the choice morsels and verses, so that we may store them up in our heart and have them for ammunition when we are attacked.

And as one final notation, Paul notes that we must always pray. It is definitely indispensable. You CAN'T do without it. Prayer is our link to communication with God. How else will we know what to do if we do not call on the name of the Lord and commune with Him? We MUST have that fellowship with the Lord. We MUST pray!!

 

This is a great day of reflection for me. This is probably one of the more enlightening times I have had reading these verses than ever before. Thinking about all these elements of the armor of God help me to better understand all the things that I have to protect myself against Satan. Knowing that God gives us this armor, and that He is always the general leading us in the battles, makes me feel good. God is always our guide and will lead us in the right direction and help us fight the good fight.

 

So, suit up everyone!! :) ALWAYS wear the armor of God so you can be prepared to fight every battle that comes your way. Oh, and be careful to "watch your back." Don't be caught off guard by a surprise attack from behind. That's where good believers come in handy. They'll "get your back." Having good friends in Christ is a good line of defense; which is why I am grateful for all of you!!! God bless all who read this!!!

(Sorry I am late in posting this).

Day 14 of 21 days of prayer:

Today in Daniel 10, I read about how the angels helped Daniel understand the visions that he had. I also seen how the angels came ready to battle the evil forces and demons at work in the world. It was an encouraging reminder to me that God is always on our side and will always be there fighting for us!

I never had a more clear understanding of it until today. A dear friend from church had invited me to the prayer room below the stage. I went, though feeling somewhat unsure. Last week, I missed the service because I was giving blood. Now, I was going to miss it again. But, I felt like I should go down there.

I got there, and at first thought I had missed something. I didn’t see anyone, but I went to another part of the area and found a few ladies there. We were praying for one of them, and I put my hand on her and started praying in tongues. Next, I prayed for a woman that I had prayed for once before, a few years ago. She was, once again, struggling with some of the same painful issues of her past. I prayed over her and I don’t know if I was feeling the release of the evil spirit from her, from me, or both. But we were both moaning, crying, and screaming. Then, I just felt a pain in my heart and my body just let go and I laid on the floor.

The women began praying for me as well. One of them asked me what the screaming was about, and I said I wasn’t for sure. The woman who I had been praying for exclaimed that it was condemnation. She was right. It applied to me too, because many times, I feel unworthy and I am too harsh on myself. So, we talked and prayed about it more, and I explained how I felt God was calling me to something bigger, but I was afraid.

They prayed over me to let it go, but I couldn’t muster up the words. I pleaded with them to just plead the blood of Jesus and to help me understand. I finally jumped up and felt like I got it. I began stomping on the ground in victory and telling Satan that he was nothing and would not master me or have victory over me. I would be his worst nightmare, and I would do what God wants me to do.

I went on for a while just bashing Satan and claiming the victory, when one of the women stopped me and told me that I needed to stop yelling at Satan and start talking to God. It totally made sense to me because so many times, I am at war with myself. I am on the defensive trying to fight my own battles against Satan, that I forget that God is there to fight for me. Just as I wrote about Daddy’s arms, that is where I needed to be. Even as they prayed over me again, as I laid facedown in tears, they were talking about the comfort of His arms.

It just amazes me how God works and how everyone tends to be on the same page. It’s all just one big confirmation of how things have been working in my life. They prayed that I would let go of fear and to trust God and they anointed me with oil. They anointed me on my ears, so that I would hear God. They anointed my head and my face so that I would speak the Word of God and know it in my heart and mind. They prayed that I might know the mind of Christ, and that all the crazy busy thoughts in my head would just quiet down and I would know peace and stillness in the Lord.

I couldn’t stop thinking about “the mind of Christ.” How we are to “take captive every thought,” and more and more, things made sense. I want to have the thoughts of Christ. I want to know what he would be thinking and doing in every situation. I want to challenge every thought, and measure it to the Word of God; not to myself or anyone else’s standards. At the same time, though, I need to simplify, and not analyze every single thing. I can strive to do what’s right, but I WILL make mistakes because I am NOT perfect. Only by the blood of Jesus am I made perfect.

There is so much more that transpired. So much more conversations and words that just confirmed all the more why I was there, and that a fresh anointing is going to come to our church, our community, and nation. Whatever God wants me to do, I will do it. It may not even be as big as my own mind makes it out to be. The smaller things are just as important.

I know that I need to just take it day by day and make each day count. I know that I just need to keep succeeding in what I am doing right now, and not something that has yet to be. All of this will prepare me for the plans God has for me.

God has a plan for us all. Sometimes, we have so many ideas of what we want or could do for the Lord, that it’s hard to pick and choose and know what the right choices are. Many times, I have jumped into something without thinking or praying about it. I didn’t count the cost, and I backed out. I jumped in, out of a sense of duty or obligation, and only ended up embarrassing myself when I backtracked out of it. So, I have learned the hard way to think twice and only to move if I truly feel led and if it coincides with my gifts and what God places on my heart.

We all need to be led by the Spirit, and not take on too much. No matter how many times God has told it to me, I still seem to forget it. I don’t want to forget it again. I want to learn to simplify; as he always tells me. I want to remember not to try TOO HARD or exhaust myself.

I need to remember to let God fight my battles too. We can’t fight Satan alone. He will drain you. You must be submitted to God, and let him step up to bat for you. We must run to Daddy and “tattle” on the devil, and let God deal with Him. A bully will badger you and bash you and drain you of your strength. You go to know when to run to Daddy and have him make things better. Daddy will straighten that bully out! Then, Daddy will affirm us of the truths and erase the bad things that Satan is trying to fill our heads with.

Sometimes, we are so programmed with the bad that we can’t replace it with the good because we have believed the lies so long. So, what I am going to do, is write down the messages that come into my head over and over again. I will write/type it out and then challenge that thought. For example, a lot of times, I hear “You’re fake,” or "You're lazy," in my head. I will have to write that down, and then challenge it. I will deconstruct it and ask God what He thinks and allow him to erase that lie and replace it with truth. That will become my statement of affirmation. So, I will have affirmation after affirmation of truths written down, and I will read them at least once a day, so I can reprogram myself.

So, if you have negative messages playing in your head all day every day, identify them and write them down. Don’t believe them anymore!! Take those thoughts captive and deconstruct them with God. Ask him to tell you what is REALLY true, and BREAK DOWN that lie and cast it away!! Turn those lies inside out and upside down and turn it into a statement of affirmation. Write them down until you have a whole lists of REAL truths about yourself. Read them at least once every day. Then, you will learn to know the REAL you and not the truly “fake” you that Satan is trying to make you believe that you are.

I have learned so much today, and it’s only the beginning. I pray that we will all begin learning the truth about ourselves and claim our own victories!! God bless all who read this!!

Day 13 of 21 days of prayer:

 

Today’s reading is Daneil 9 and Isaiah 56:5-8. Daniel 9 really provoked more in my heart today. Daniel was praying a prayer of confession. He was fasting as well, and submitting his prayers to the Lord. He was asking forgiveness for his people, and included himself among them. He didn’t act as though he were exempt from their sins. That shows humility and honesty. We are all sinners. We shouldn’t be like the Pharisees and act as though we are somehow less sinful than our brother or sister in Christ. No, we should be like Daniel and identify our sins with others, and pray. We should seek forgiveness as we humble ourselves before the Lord and pray for his mercy.

 

As Daniel was praying, God sent Gabriel to come and bring him understanding and wisdom. He showed him visions of what was to come, including prophesies that coincide with those in Revelation. It’s something we all need to be aware of, because I do believe we are in the end times. The anti-christ will be coming about soon. It foretells of how he makes peace in Israel for a time, but then breaks the peace. Then, he does away with organized religion, and forces everyone to worship himself. It’s coming people. We must decide whose side we are on.

It’s time to gather together; we must know and worship the Lord. We are his people; let us band together as in these next verses from Isaiah 56:5-8:

 

5 Even unto them will I give in mine house and within my walls a place and a name better than of sons and of daughters: I will give them an everlasting name, that shall not be cut off.

 

6 Also the sons of the stranger, that join themselves to the LORD, to serve him, and to love the name of the LORD, to be his servants, every one that keepeth the sabbath from polluting it, and taketh hold of my covenant;

 

7 Even them will I bring to my holy mountain, and make them joyful in my house of prayer: their burnt offerings and their sacrifices shall be accepted upon mine altar; for mine house shall be called a house of prayer for all people.

 

8 The Lord GOD, which gathereth the outcasts of Israel saith, Yet will I gather others to him, beside those that are gathered unto him.

 

When we honor God, he will honor our prayers. When we humble ourselves, seek Him out, and submit ourselves to Him, we will see the hand of God move. I pray that we will see it more than ever in these perilous times. May we all gather together and get down on our knees and pray for the Lord to reign down his power and might. I pray that godly leaders will rise up and serve Him, and that this nation (and world) will take heed of Him and head in a better direction.

 

Even now, this nation is getting geared up for the presidential election. The media is hungry for a victory for their biased and ungodly liberal ideas. It is no secret how they feel about president Bush and the Christians in this nation who wish morality and values to reign. The liberals are just hoping that one of their own will take hold of the white house and begin to push their horrible agendas forward. I had been praying for a godly candidate to step forward and stand up for Christ. I sure don’t want to see Hillary or Obama in office, and watch our morals, and this nation, come to ruin. Even some of the Republican candidates didn’t look much better.

 

The Lord always provides a way. I believe that is why he has called Sam Brownback to stand in the gap on his behalf. I know many of you don’t get into politics, but we are responsible for who we support and elect. I choose to vote for morals and values, which is why I cannot willingly elect people from the Democratic party. I am all too proud to stand behind God and those He has chosen to represent righteousness. I praise Him for calling Sam Brownback to stand up for the ways of the Lord. Of course, many may not even know that name because the media wishes to silence the Christian voice. However, I am going to be that voice right now. Sam Brownback stands up for the pre-born babies and BOLDY proclaims that Roe vs. Wade should be overturned, and that he would nominate judges who would support that effort. Not only that, he stands up for families, and our Christian values. He supports holy God ordained marriages between a man and a woman, and opposes the perversion of God’s intentions for marriage. He doesn’t waver in his stance for what is right, and I applaud him for it.

 

The media doesn’t support what is right in the eyes of God, so they will mention Sam as little as possible. They wish to bury him in the candidate pile, and only edify those that glorify their own detestable wishes for the future of this country. Therefore, I have felt led to spread the word about this good man, so that he will gain a support base and propel him into the spotlight and acquire the nomination. Of course, that can’t happen without prayer and financial support. Pray for Sam, and if you can, send a small contribution. The more means he has for running, the better his chance of getting enough people to turn heads and nominate him. I have personally sent him something, and asked God to bless it and multiply it. I have also been praying for him whenever he crosses my mind.

 

I know that politics are a touchy subject, but I guess I just felt led to write about this after reading about God’s people standing together on that mountain. This is one of the ways we stand together and say, “Yes, Lord. Your will be done.” These are the kind of leaders God wants. This is how more people will be drawn back to Him; through godly leadership.

 

I know that my blog was a little different today, but I believe it is necessary. We have to stand up for what is right in every area; politics not excluded. In fact, it is IMPERATIVE that Christians be involved in politics, because that is how the fate of this nation is decided. We can’t allow those we elect to turn God’s laws upside down and flush this nation’s principles down the toilet. Therefore, we must pray for them, and elect the ones that will uphold the laws of the Lord.

 

Here is Sam’s website if you want to see more: http://www.t-worx.com/Default.aspx?alias=www.t-worx.com/brownback  God bless all who read this!!

Yesterday, I forgot to talk about the other verses included in the reading of day 12 of 21 days of prayer. They are verses too good to overlook; verses that spoke volumes to me. They were verses from Psalm 91:

 

1 He that dwelleth in the secret place of the most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.

 

2 I will say of the LORD, He is my refuge and my fortress: my God; in him will I trust.

 

3 Surely he shall deliver thee from the snare of the fowler, and from the noisome pestilence.

 

4 He shall cover thee with his feathers, and under his wings shalt thou trust: his truth shall be thy shield and buckler.

 

5 Thou shalt not be afraid for the terror by night; nor for the arrow that flieth by day;

 

6 Nor for the pestilence that walketh in darkness; nor for the destruction that wasteth at noonday.

 

7 A thousand shall fall at thy side, and ten thousand at thy right hand; but it shall not come nigh thee.

 

8 Only with thine eyes shalt thou behold and see the reward of the wicked.

 

9 Because thou hast made the LORD, which is my refuge, even the most High, thy habitation;

 

10 There shall no evil befall thee, neither shall any plague come nigh thy dwelling.

 

11 For he shall give his angels charge over thee, to keep thee in all thy ways.

 

12 They shall bear thee up in their hands, lest thou dash thy foot against a stone.

 

13 Thou shalt tread upon the lion and adder: the young lion and the dragon shalt thou trample under feet.

 

14 Because he hath set his love upon me, therefore will I deliver him: I will set him on high, because he hath known my name.

 

15 He shall call upon me, and I will answer him: I will be with him in trouble; I will deliver him, and honour him.

16 With long life will I satisfy him, and shew him my salvation.

Well, breaking it down verse by verse, that is saying a lot. Verse one talks about dwelling in the secret place. To me, that speaks of quiet time with God. It is time that I truly got to have today. I put the kids down for naps, and I really took some time to get quiet. Sometimes, I struggle with that, but I find that when I do it as I do with the blogs, I concentrate better. So, I typed out my prayers and feelings, and did so for quite some time. I don’t know why that helps, but it does. You feel such a peace when you spend time with God, and tell him your prayers and feelings. You feel closer and you know that he is hearing you. Like you are just sitting on Daddy’s lap and telling him all about it and he listens and says, “Ok, I will see what I can do about that.” And then, he acts on it. Prayers move God to act. It opens the floodgates of heaven, and the Holy Spirit rains down.

 

He is, indeed, our refuge and fortress. He is our safe place and our security. He protects us and shelters us in the comfort of His arms. Just thinking about it and typing it right now makes me feel so peaceful. Like he is rocking me in His arms. Is there any greater comfort than when Daddy holds you in the strength of His arms of love?

 

In Daddy’s arms, fear melts away. You feel protected and untouchable. I remember, when I was little, when something would scare me, and I would run to my Dad. He would hold me and say, “It’s ok. Daddy will protect you.” I wasn’t always sure what the word “protect” meant, but I loved to hear him say it, because it conveyed safety to me. I felt truly safe, because Daddy said it was so. Daddy always said that he was there for me. I knew I could count on him, and that no one would hurt me, so long as he was there. Daddy was always in my corner to fight for me. What comfort; what love.

 

Even as I think about it, and write it out, it brings warmth to my heart and tears to my eyes. My Daddy is still that same Daddy. He is always there. And if my earthly father loves me like that, how much MORE does my heavenly Father who gave breath and life to me? How much MORE does my very Father and creator of my being love and protect me? How much MORE, then, shall I run to HIM for my every need? How much MORE can he comfort me, in that stillness; in the quiet, when no one else is there. How much MORE does He understand? How much MORE can my heavenly Father care for me, and help me through everything that I go through? Who knows and understand better than He? Who else loves me with that love? HIS love is truly untouchable; even greater than our earthly parents’ love. If I could only understand even a fraction of what I ponder right now………..oh, Lord…….how beautiful and wonderful!!!

 

Do we not all crave that perfect love and peace? Is not God the only one who delivers it? He even provides his angels to watch over us and protect us; to protect his children. He loves us and delights in us. Just as any parents wants to protect their children, and monitor their every move, so does God want to watch out for us, and be there should we fall. Shouldn’t we, then, be confident in calling on the one and only name above all names? We have the honor and privilege of calling him “Abba”: Father. Shouldn’t we be running to Him just as we would run to our Mommies and Daddies in our youth? We are never too old to run to Him for comfort. Our hearts should be like the hearts of little children who are dependent on their parents. We are to be dependent on God.

 

I am in such a great state of awe and wonder at the love and might of my Father. Oh God, how great is the love that you have for me!! Thank you for loving me!! Praise be to your name!!

 

God bless all who read this!

Day 12 of 21 days of prayer:

 

Today's reading was in Daniel 8. It described another vision that Daniel had. It tells of the happenings of the rulers and conquers in history, as well as what is to come in the future, concerning the end times and the anti-christ.

 

As I said before, I don't go into prophecy very much. It isn't my strongest point of understanding. All I know is that God's Word is true, and that everything He says comes to pass. So, with that being said, we all better be ready! If we aren't, we are in BIG TROUBLE!! We need to be aware of what's going on. The end times are definitely all around us. There are wars and rumors of wars, and natural disasters of every kind, and our moral situation is like it was in the days of Noah. All of these things are what the Bible says the end times will be like; and it is only the beginning.

 

We all got to band together. Though we are in the midst of evil, we must stand strong and united. It is no reason to give up on righteousness, but to CLING TO IT MORE THAN EVER AND FIGHT FOR IT!!! We MUST stand firm until the end!!! Never give up!!

 

Well, that's pretty much my thoughts for today. I had a pretty tiresome day. All this snow has Mitch working overtime because of all the people who can't make it to work. So, he had to work his day off today. I had to tote the kids around by myself, to my son's speech therapy, shopping, and whatever else. In and out of the van; in and out of the cold. BRRRRRRR!! LOL

 

Well, I guess until next time: God bless all who read this!

Day 10 of 21 days of prayer:

 

Today's reading was in Daniel 6. I guess I never realized how many famous stories came from these first few chapters of Daniel. Today, I read about Daniel in the lion's den of course.

 

Reading about Daniel's faith and commitment to the Lord is just awesome to me. I want to have that kind of faith. I want to continually rely on God for His strength, protection, and guidance, so I can be a modern day Daniel, and boldly face persecution.

 

There are all sorts of people that conspire against us Christians. The world is always downplaying the value and importance of morals, ethics, and values. Stay-at-home-moms, and the importance of their roles, are scoffed at. Everyone is busy and doing things their way. We are selfish and self-absorbed, and don't take enough time outs  to spend on the most important things.

 

We have all sorts of "Lions" in our lives. But, just like Daniel, God will protect us from those types of things when we are submitted to His authority, as Daniel was. Daniel always sought out righteousness, and made sure his ways were pleasing to the Lord.

 

Today, being Valentine's day, love is often the focus. Of course, love (REAL LOVE) is the most important thing in life. That real love was the very drive for Jesus to do what He did on the cross for us. That's the type of love we should seek and know; the kind of love worth living, and dying for. It is unconditional sacrificial love that goes beyond just like or lust. Love is something that is deeper and withstands anything that is thrown at it.

 

There are many articles that you can read about Valentine's day. A brief synopsis would be to say that a long time ago in Rome, the emperor, Claudius, declared that the young men couldn't get married. He sought to build a bigger army, and felt that the young men being tied down to wives an families hindered them from being in the army.

 

A man named St. Valentine rebelled against the emperor, and continued to marry couples. He was eventually jailed, and he would write and receive notes from children who were thinking of him and praying for him. He woudl sign them "from your Valentine."

There are many stories about St. Valentine, including the fact that February 14th is the day he was martyred. But, at least we know that he knew what real love was and is, and that it is an important part of life.

 

Well, Happy Valentine's Day to everyone!!! Love yourself; love others; and seek true love (the love that is in Christ). God bless all who read this!

Day 9 of 21 days of prayer:

 

Today's reading is Daniel 5 as well as Psalms 37:1-5. Daniel 5 is the chapter that contains the famous "writing on the wall." The king in this chapter had very much the same problem as Nebuchadnezzar did. He had little regard for God, and worshipped idols. And, as he and others were dining, he was terrified to see a hand writing an inscription on the wall. He sent for people to interpret it for him, but no one knew. Then, Daniel came and told him that it meant that God had numbered his kingdom and finished it; that he was weighed in the balances and found wanting; and that the kingdom would be divided and given to the Medes and Persians. That very night, the king was slain, and the kingdom, indeed, was overtaken by the Median: Darius.

 

Psalms 37:1-5: "Fret not thyself because of evildoers, neither be thou envious against the workers of iniquity. For they shall soon be cut down like the grass, and wither as the green herb. Trust in the Lord, and do good; so shalt thou dwell in the land, and verily thou shalt be fed. Delight thyself also in the Lord; and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart. Commit thy way unto the Lord; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass."

 

So far, in this 21 days of prayer time, I have read and seen how pride and disobedience brings disaster. I also see that when you have an attitude of Daniel's, much joy and success follows. The kings that disregarded God ended up with nothing in the long run. They were always humbled and brought to ruin. Daniel, on the other hand, remained faithful to the Lord, and followed Him. He dilligently sought out the Lord, and was able to carry out the will of God because He remained obedient to the Lord. He was submitted to God and so, the Lord was able to do great things for him and through him.

 

Psalms also reminds us that we shouldn't envy the wealthy and prosperous of this world, because they really have nothing. They will pass away, along with their worthless money, without ever knowing real treasure. We children of God, on the other hand, know great treasure!! Even MORE so if we know that in putting God first, we will have even greater joy! In verses four and five, it say that when we delight ourselves in the Lord, he WILL give us the desires of our heart. We must commit and trust in Him, and He will make things happen for us.

So, if things aren't happening the way you want, we ought to ask ourselves "Am I delighting in the Lord? Am I trusting Him? Am I with His will or outside of His will?" He knows our desires that our in our heart. And, if they are truly honorable things that line up with His will for us, those things will come to pass. Not always in the way or time that we want, but it will happen.

 

Well, those are my thoughts for the day. I have yet to really pray today. I'm still struggling with prayer issues. Just finding moments of quiet and stilness is difficult. I have a hard time concentrating and simplifying things, especially when the kids are doing their thing. I think I get them settled down to eat or play or whatever, and I take a moment to pray and be with God. Then, just when I get into it, I hear one of them screaming or crying, or they come in and tell me they are done with their food or whatever. Dear Lord, what do I do? I feel like such a disorganized mess!

 

I know things would be a little better if I could just get organized and make some sort of a daily schedule. If only I could get up earlier in the morning; that would help me have time to myself and what not. However, I have never been a morning person. I TRULY wish I could be. I am so lazy when it comes to getting up, and my sleep. If anyone has any advice on how to ENJOY waking up and STAYING up, I would LOVE to hear it.

 

Well, until tomorrow, God bless all who read this!!

Day 8 of 21 days of prayer:

 

Today's reading was in Daniel 4. It's the chapter where Nebuchadnezzar has a dream that Daniel interprets for him. In the dream, the king is basically told that pride will be his downfall. It definitely turns out to be true when God strips him of his kingdom.

There are times when we get too big for our britches and forget who we are and who's in charge. Some people get so wrapped up in themselves and their self-importance that they forget that God is the one who is in control. Then, they have to learn the hard way when God humbles them.

 

That is my continual prayer, that I would know what it means to be humble and not become arrogant. That is always a fear deep in my heart. I just don't want to be like Nebuchadnezzar, or any other person who finds success and then loses their way.  It's not that I think I would be this kind of person, but not everyone handles success the same way. Me, I am so disorganized most of the time, and I feel that having additional responsibilities would just screw me up even more. But, God knows what He is doing. I pray that He will show me how to make a plan to get organized. I just never know where to start.

 

Well, I guess I don't know what else to say other than the fact that today was my son's three year anniversary of getting his hearing aids. For those of you that don't know, he was born hearing impaired and he got his hearing aids when he was about 10 months old. I just can't believe it's been this long already. He will be four in March. AAAAAaah!!! :P

 

My son truly is a blessing. God has taught me a lot, and all that I have learned, and am learning, is a great experience. I also need to find the time to learn more sign language. I need to take some classes. So far, we have just been picking it up on our own through using our sign book, and doing pretty well.

 

Anyways, this has been a great day. I am so grateful for my son; and my daughter too, of course. We always make a point of celebrating this day to remind us all of the blessing that he is. Our differences are something to be honored and celebrated. I want him to always feel special, and being hearing impaired is a gift. God made him this way for a reason, and we accept it as nothing less than a gift. Whatever Casey accomplishes will be for God's glory. He has already done more than most have ever expected, and I know he's only going to do better as time goes on.

 

I praise God for my blessings and am hoping that I will never forget how blessed I am. May we all remember to count our blessings; big and small. Whether it be our family, friends, our home, jobs, and even the successes we have in reaching our goals in life. God bless all who read this.

Day 7 of 21 days of prayer:

Today's reading was the third chapter of Daniel. In that chapter lies the famous story of Shadrach, Meshack, and Abednego. They refused to bow down to the king's idols. They stood firm in their commitment to the Lord, the one true God.

The king was enraged and ordered that they should perish in a firey furnace. Yet, when they were in the fire, they were not consumed. Even as the king observed, he saw a fourth man in the fire with the three he had thrown in. He was astounded and ordered that the men come out.

The men were unharmed. They came out intact, and without one article of them singed, nor stenched with the smell of the burning blazes. God had delivered them, and the miracle of that witness, I'm sure, had lasting effects.

That is the kind of "on fire" witness we are all called to be. It speaks volumes to me. The Lord is always with us, and with that fire of God in our heart, the "flames" of men and of this world cannot singe us. We are untouchable with the Lord on our side. That is not to say that we won't have trouble or persecution, but the Lord will bring us through it, and glory awaits in the ultimate end when we meet Him in heaven.

The passion and fire of the Lord will motivate us to do anything. He motivates me to take charge of my health, weight, and fitness, which I am sure is a gateway to other things. Succeeding in this will help me succeed in other areas too. The self-control and discipline that comes from this will empower me in all other ares of my life.

I pray we can all be empowered to stand firm in our convictions, and in our faith. May we all enjoy great successes in the Lord. God bless all who read this!

Sorry I didn't post yesterday. We were gone all day. The following blog has to do with my 21 days of prayer journey, and much more. Today, I gained a deeper insight about failure..... something we all struggle with. So, if you want to know about the the blessing I have found in failure, read until the end!

 

Day 5 and 6 of 21 days of prayer:

 

The scripture for these two days are Daniel 1 and 2. I won't type both chapters out, but I will comment on what I'm thinking.

Daniel and his friends Hananiah, Mishael, and Azariah, were taken into captivity and their names were even changed from Hebrew names to Babylonian names: Belteshazzar, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abendego. But, even though their names  were changed, their faith remained unshaken. They stayed true and loyal to their faith regardless of the pressure to be like the Babylonians.

 

Throughout these two chapters, it is shown that they all take it upon themselves to seek the Lord and pray often. In turn, the Lord grants them wisdom and blessings because of their dilligence and obedience.

 

This has been a great growing time for me. I'm hoping to be more and more disciplined. I want to be a better prayer warrior, and make a prayer list so I don't forget things I want to pray for (including all of my friends on here). :)

 

I'm also getting spontaneous insights into what makes me tick. Today, for example, I was watching Full House (one of my favorite shows). I had just gotten Season Five and it was an episdoe where Stephanie was doing a dance recital. I remember different times in my childhood where I took an interest in dance, or other things that required a lot of work and effort. I also happened to remember that many times, when I wanted to pursue something, my mother would discourage me from it. I'm sure she didn't do this on purpose, (she just probably was trying to assess my commitment level to something before pouring her time and resources into it)  but she would often tell me that something would be really hard or difficult, and require a lot of work, and then I would end up with a self-defeating attitude. Either I would start it and quit, or quit before I even started.

 

I remember one time, we had watched some people perform a ballet at school. I was inspired by it and told my mom that I would like to become a dancer like that. Now, everyone knows that kids dreams change over and over, so it's not like I probably would have done it anyways. However, it would have helped to hear, "That's great! If you want to try that, you can," or something like that. But, what did I hear? I heard, "Honey, that's nice, but you can't do that because you have weak ankles. It would make it really hard for you to do that." I remember crying and getting upset at her for discouraging me, but she said she wasn't doing that, and that she was just pointing out the fact that I just couldn't do it because of my feet.

 

I know that she had a point, but at the same time, I don't think someone's limits should dicatate their life. There are many people that have disabilities that stun everyone by doing things they aren't supposed to be able to do. I see that all the time with my hearing impaired son, and his development.

 

So, when I was thinking about all this today, it finally dawned on me why I give up so quickly on things, or don't even try. I am always afraid of failing, or that it will be too hard and I'll get in over my head. I get overwhelmed before I even start, so I don't even try.

I'm not trying to blame my mom for all this. This behavior is mine to change. However, I do see the pattern. My Mom and Grandma both sometimes shy away from the "hard stuff" too. Weight loss is no exception. There were times where I would tell my mom that I was going to fit into this or that again, and she would say "yeah, I always say that too," as if I couldn't make it possible because she didn't have success herself. Even now, when I talk about reaching my goal, she talks about being able to keep it off. I mean, I KNOW it's a hard thing, but it's not impossible. THIS time, I WILL do it.

 

I know that weight loss, or any other big goal, seems hard and impossible sometimes. The truth is, though, it's only as hard as you make it. When I thought about all the times I have held myself back because of the "it's too hard" factor, I feel rather upset. NOTHING is impossible with God! He will help me accomplish this and much more! I will keep the weight off; I will write that book; I will be a good mom, etc. etc. NOTHING is too hard for me. I have got to restructure my thinking, and catch myself when it happens. I will not let that learned behavior stick around anymore. The cycle stops here, and will not be passed on.

 

I hope I never tell my kids that they "can't" do something. Even if it looks impossible to me, I know that nothing is impossible if you really want to pursue it. I'll do whatever I can to support their dreams, so that they can explore their purpose and find their destiny. Some of it will be trial and error. Maybe they will want to dance, but then give up if it doesn't fit who they are, and then we will move on to the next thing, whether it be karate, or music, or whatever. I know that if I had tried dancing, I probably wouldn't have stuck with it, but being enabled and encouraged to try and explore my possiblities would have been a great experience. If I failed, so what. I could learn from it and adjust. It's better to find out for yourself what you can and can't do, then to have a preset assumption about yourself and not try at all. Aren't we all worth exploring our potentials?

 

Maybe I got off topic, but that's ok. It all really does come back to seeking God. If I keep seeking God, I will continue to learn more things about myself and the gifts that I have that I may not have known before. It's important to pursue those unknowns sometimes. In fact, some of the greatest self-discoveries have come about because of "giving up" on something else. In fact, my most favorite classes in school (speech and photography) were classes that I took to fill up my schedule when I "quit" choir. Had I not given on something that my whole heart wasn't in, I wouldn't have gotten to take these two classes that I ended up absolutely LOVING (which helped develop my more NATURAL gifts and talents that I discovered I really enjoyed). So, when you think about it, failure is often "freeing." :) Failure is a blessing because it helps give you cues about what to do next. You can adjust you plan, your vision, and your goals and be able to take a step back to examine it all.

 

So, likewise, even though I have not had the best of success with weight loss in the past, that does not mean that I can't have success now. Many times, I would try a new exercise machie or program, and then give up because I got bored or it didn't work for me or something. That didn't mean that I couldn't do it, or that I was a failure. Whether it be weight-loss or something else, your goals have to be customized. It has to be do-able for you, and tailored to who you are and what you enjoy. That is why I am succeeding now, because the exercise I do are things that are do-able for me, and exercises that click with who I am, and I enjoy doing it. I know that I will probably even try more and more exercises to vary it up and find new things to like. That is what makes "this time" different. My attitude is different. I am redefining what success and failure means. So far, I have had no failures, because everything is a beneficial learning experience; even mistakes. FAILURE, is when you FAIL to do ANYTHING at all.

 

I believe I can do it. I am doing more than just one aspect of things. I'm doing exercise AND nutrition, combined with support, education, and self-awareness (and of course, prayer). I explored the "unknowns" of untouched aspects of weight loss that I haven't looked at before, and am now finding the keys to success because of it. How much more success will I have in other areas of my life if I continue to be bold and not be scared off by my own self-made assumptions?

 

I pray we all learn to challenge our internal dialogue and that we can get to the roots of where they come from. I have had a lot of eye openeing moments that have given me insight into what makes me tick. I don't know if my Mom reads these blogs or not, but I pray that she won't be upset by them. I am not blaming her for anything. In fact, there are MANY good aspects of myself that I got from my Mom. The same sex parent is the most influential person in a child's life, so that plays a great part into who I am.

 

Parents are constantly teaching whether they know it or not. A parent's personality and behavior shapes their child; whether they are intending it to or not.  I know that is what my role will be in my daughter's life as well. I want to model the best behavior possible. Therefore, my thinking and beliefs about myself must be positive. I won't put myself down, or nit-pick at myself in the mirror, or call myself "fat" or anything like that, because even though she is the sweetest and cutest little girl ever, she will feel like an ugly duckling if that's the kind of view I display of myself. I want to be the best me I can be. I pray we all continually strive for doing our best. :) God bless all who read this!

Day 4 of 21 days of prayer:

Jeremiah 31:31-34

“Behold, the days come, saith the Lord, that I will make a new covenant with the house of Israel, and with the house of Judah: Not according to the covenant that I made with their fathers in the day that I took them by the hand to bring them out of the land of Egypt; which my covenant they brake, although I was a husband unto them, saith the Lord: But this shall be the covenant that I will make with the house of Israel; After those days, saith the Lord, I will put my law in their inward parts, and write it in their hearts; and will be their God, and they shall be my people. And they shall teach no more every man his neighbor, and every man his brother, saying, Know the Lord: for they shall all know me, from the least of them unto the greatest of them, saith the Lord: for I will forgive their iniquity, and I will remember their sin no more.”

How grateful I am that I am under the new covenant!! How blessed I am that I can come to the Lord through the blood of Jesus!! I don’t have to go through a priest, or any other man to get to God. I don’t have to put animal sacrifices on the altar. All I have to do is claim the pure blood of the lamb; which is Jesus Christ. Then, I may go into the Holy of Holies and be with the Lord. That veil was torn so that all may enter. Jesus died on the cross to make that possible. From that sacrifice, we are able to have a relationship with God; every single one of us. Rich and poor; weak and strong; no matter who you are, you can have a relationship with God! Who else could have made that possible but Jesus Christ?

I know I did this last time, but there is another Jeremy Camp song that is just playing in my mind right now. It’s called “This Man.”

In only a moment truth was seen; revealed this mystery. The crown that showed no dignity; he wore. And the king was placed for all the world to show disgrace, but only beauty flowed from this place.

Chorus

Would you take the place of this man?

Would you take the nails from his hands?
Would you take the place of this man?
Would you take the nails from his hands?

He held the weight of impurity; the Father would not see. The reasons had finally come to be to show the depth of his grace flowed with every sin erased. He knew that this was why he came. (Chorus)

And we just don’t know. The blood and water flowed. And in it all He showed, just how much he cared. And the veil was torn so we could have this open door and all these things have finally been complete. (Chorus)

I don’t know how many of you listen to Jeremy Camp, but he is my absolute favorite. My heart is touched every time I listen to the songs he writes. God has given him a talent, and hearts are touched. God reveals things to me, and speaks to me so much through these songs, and I understand more about his love, grace, and mercy, all the time. Tears flow my eyes, and I weep in awe and wonder when I think of how awesome God is. The music and words are so powerful, and those prayerful words reach the very depths of my soul. I encourage anyone who hasn’t heard these songs to do so sometime. I have all of his CDS and they are such a blessing in my life.

This song, like all of them, are deep and real. This song talks about the fulfillment of the new covenant through Jesus Christ. Everything Jesus went through; everything He suffered; was for you. ALL OF IT so that you would have a chance to accept His sacrifice and have that special and indescribable relationship with God. Who wouldn’t want that? I can’t imagine not having that in my life. Yet, sadly, so many choose to live with Jesus in their lives. Some even openly reject and metaphorically spit into the face of God with their denials of His love for them.

Jesus is the reason I live and breathe. I am so grateful that He gave this new covenant to all of us. ANYONE and EVERYONE can call on the name of Christ and be saved. I am so glad that He is my God, and that I am one of His people; His many children. My sins are forgiven; He remembers them no more. He instills His Word and commandments in my heart, and guides me through my life. What a joy!! What a blessing!! May you also be blessed, and if you are reading this and don’t know this joy, just reach out to Him. Ask Him to come into your heart and save you from your sins. Confess and believe in Him, and you will join His family too. GOD BLESS ALL WHO READ THIS!!

 

(Sorry this post is late. Been having computer problems off and on and couldn't post until now).

 

Day 3 of 21 days of prayer:

 

Jeremiah 32:36-41

 

"And now therefore thus saith the Lord, the God of Israel, concerning this city, whereof ye say, It shall be delivered into the hand of the king of Babylon by the sword, and by the famine, and by the pestilence; Behold, I will gather them out of all countries, whither I have driven them in mine anger, and in my fury, and in great wrath; and I will bring them again unto this place, and I will cause them to dwell safely: And they shall be my people, and I will be their God: And I will give them one heart, and one way, that they may fear me for ever, for the good of them, and of their children after them: And I will make an everlasting covenant with them, that I will not turn away from them, to do them good; but I will put my fear in their hearts, that they shall not depart from me. Yea, I will rejoice over them to do them good, and I will plant them in this land assuredly with my whole heat and with my whole soul."

 

God loves to draw us back to Him. Even when we have run away in disobedience, His promise is that He will always takes us back; because He loves us. Check out these song lyrics "Take You Back" by Jeremy Camp:

 

The reason why I stand; the answer lies in you. You hung to make me strong though my praise was few. When I fall I bring your name down  but I have found in you, a heart that bleeds forgiveness, replacing all these thoughts of paiful memories...but I know your response will always be.....

 

(Chorus)

I'll take you back always
Even when your fight is over now
I'll take you back always
Even when the pain is coming through
I'll take you back

 

You satisfy this cry of what I'm looking for; and I'll take all I can and lay it down before  The throne of endless grace now that radiates what's true;  I'm in the only place that erases all these faults that have overtaken me and I know that your response will always be.... (Chorus)

 

I can only speak with a grateful heart as I'm peirced by this gift of your love.  I will always bring an offering I can never thank you enough

You take me back always even when my fight is over ow you take me back even when my pain is coming through you take me back.

What a beautiful song!! It's one of my favorites because it shows that no matter what we have done, or who we have become, God will forgive us and welcome us back into His arms and embrace us. He will love us through our pain, and forgive us for our sins. He will put that holy fear of Him in our hearts to keep us drawn to Him, so that our love and respect for Him will keep us grounded in our faith, and kee us from running away again.

 

That's what today's lesson meant to me. I had another hard day of getting through prayers again. The kids were in a mood, and a lost some patience today. But, before I go to bed, I will pray some more. I know that God always takes me back; even when I have a bad day. "Tomorrow is always fresh with no mistakes" - Anne of Green Gables Movie.  Indeed, His mercies are new every morning.

 

We are His people, and He is our mighty and awesome God! That is His promise to us. I pray that the wisdom and passion that He puts into our hearts will be unified; and that we will all seek Him and His purpose in every area of our lives. Then, we will all be one in the body of Christ. God bless all who read this!!

Ok, I'm back. The "good" me, is back. ;) You don't have to cower and hide anymore. LOL The last blog was raw and real, just as they all are, but that one showed a different side of real.

 

So, as I closed the last blog, I did go and pray. The prayer team at church gave us all a very soft and comfortable "prayer pillow" for us to lay on, pray on, cry on, hold on, whatever (and I've done a little of each). It also has a verse safety pinned on it that reads: "Listen to me; Be silent; And I will teach you wisdom." Job 33:1-3

 

For some reason, that prayer pillow really helps. When I hold it, or lay on it, or whatever, the softness reminds me of how gentle God is, and the comfort of it brings me calm and focus, and helps me visualize God there with me; comforting me as well. It's like the pillow symbolizes the presence of God to me.

 

Anyways, I laid on the pillow and cried. I prayed and cried, and prayed and cried, and then I cried some more. I looked at the verse and remembered what a wonderful friend at the prayer group said. She said that the four sections on the pillow (the top of the pillow has seams that divide it into four squares) stood for Be/Still/And/Know.

 

When you concentrate on each word individually, you grab hold of what it means. To me, "be" is an action and the "and" is the instruction to "be" both things: "still" and "know" (aware..... knowing that God is there, and that He is the wonderful God that He is!) Then, in that silence, in that state of "being" He will speak.

 

I struggled just "being" for a while. My eyes and thoughts wondered around, until I closed my eyes; though feeling that I would mistakenly go to sleep and what good would that do me. Nevertheless, I did shut my eyes to blot out distractions. I tried to take deep breaths and relax, when I chided myself that I couldn't even do that right. I couldn't breathe and relax, and I couldn't be still and wait.

Then, as God gently told me to just stop and stay calm, He asked me why it was so important that I had to do everything "right." This was nothing new. I had been confronted by this before, but have never gotten so profound an answer as I did today. I stopped, and waited for the Lord to really bring the "why" out of me.  The why is because I WANT to be right. So, WHY do I NEED to be right? Because I need to be able to MEASURE my SUCCESS.

 

Being right gives me validation. It confirms some kind of value of worth. If I say, do, or think something right, I am somehow "earning" some type of acceptance, even if it’s just from myself. But, if I don’t do something, whether it be chores, or eating the right foods, or doing enough exercise, etc. I am somehow not good enough because I didn’t do enough. I didn’t measure up to what I believed success was, and my idea of perfection, therefore, I am a failure.

 

THAT IS SO WRONG!!! I don’t know if you see it, but I DEFINITELY saw the errors in that!! My deeds do NOT define my WORTH!!! Whether I succeed or fail has NOTHING to do with the FACT that I am VALUABLE; REGARDLESS of what I do or don’t do!!

God reminded me that I am WORTH MANY SPARROWS!!! When we think about sparrows, we see them as tiny little birds without a care in the world. God loves them and cares about them regardless if they catch a big worm, or a little worm, for dinner. He doesn’t care if their nest is big or small, and the sparrows don’t even care. All that matters is that they do what they are made to do. That is all that matters, and the impact WE leave on this world is even MORE powerful than a bunch of sparrows. We are MUCH more valuable. This phrase came to me: “Give God your best and He’ll take care of the rest.”

 

God doesn’t care if I don’t get all my chores done. He doesn’t care if I don’t do everything I feel I have to do in order to “measure up” to some crazy ideal of perfection. All that He cares about is that I give Him my best. But, even when I don’t give it my all, He still loves me. My worth, to Him, never changes. He is ALWAYS going to love me. His grace is always enough. It’s always sufficient to cover my sins. There is nothing that the blood of Jesus doesn’t cover. So, in that way, I AM made perfect.

 

My worth is in Christ. And, if I do all that I do (no matter how big or small) in the name of the Lord, it is doing it unto Him. If everything I do is because of Him, and not my kids, or my husband, or anyone else, I will have a greater satisfaction. Even if I fail, God won’t lord it over me and beat me over the head with it. . The devil is the one that does that, and we all know what a liar he is! I will never be “worth” any less to God. If anything, my value only increases over time. ;) I just need to redefine success in every area. I will still be ok with who I am regardless of how much, or how little, I get done. I can never do “enough,” anyways. My good deeds don’t “earn” me my worth, and not doing something doesn’t take away from my worth either.

 

I am so glad I took the time to really pray, and cry it out on my prayer pillow. LOL These 21 days are going to life-changing. I feel so much better now! I don’t have that attitude I had earlier today. I am calm and peaceful, and my whole body is more relaxed. Only Jesus can do that, and if He did that for me, imagine what He can do for YOU!! GOD BLESS ALL WHO READ THIS!!!!!!!!!!!